We all are fearful of things. Some fears are rational while others are completely irrational. There are so many phobias in this world and some phobias I find to be absolutely ridiculous and funny.
Take Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia for an example. What is this fear? The fear of hippos? NOPE. Ironically, this word is the longest in the dictionary and is the name for the fear of long words. Yup, you read that right — fear of long words and the LONGEST word. What you call the phobia for people being afraid of long words is exactly what they are afraid of.. a long word. The irony.
I have fears. I have phobias. I do not like heights, but I would not say I have a phobia of it. I do not freak out when too close to the edge or high up like someone who has the phobia, but I do not necessarily like it. I have no desire to sky dive and if I do not HAVE to be on a ladder… well, I will not be getting on it.
A phobia I DO have and it is really irrational (I know)… I am a coulrophobic. Yep, clowns. Scary. Creepy. Not funny. Up to no good. Clowns. I have to close my eyes or turn my head when a clown appears in books, tv and movies. I literally run the other way when I encounter one out in the wild. I never was traumatized by a clown, however, my mom holding me next to a clown when I was a child screaming my head off would tell you otherwise.
Another fear and might be a slight phobia depending on how big, hairy and does it jump? –Arachnophobia.
Spiders: 8 legs of creepiness, 8 tiny eyes to pierce your soul, and too quick for my liking. I would not say I am fully arachnophobic, but have an intense dislike for spiders. I will run from them. I will scream for Lalo to come smash them. Growing up my mom would gather the spiders and put them outside instead of killing them.. all I could think was “GREAT mom, you are putting them outside to breed and come back INside”. She would always tell me that they are more scared of you than you are of them… well, I think that is debatable. I also do not care if the other spiders see you smash this one either Sir, I think it is a good warning for them to stay in their lane if you ask me.
Enter into my life….
The cutest, most tiniest spider you have EVER seen. He made his penthouse in the window in the bathroom. He would weave elaborate webs. He would “catch” ants. He would keep to himself, mind his OWN business, so he was allowed to stay in his beautiful penthouse.
This spider was CLEARLY a sweet innocent little baby when he first appeared in our bathroom. OH, how he has grown! His web is huge and even trying to acquire more real estate by branching his web onto our shampoo and conditioner bottles. This was promptly denied and clearly had to remind Earl to stay in his corner!! He has gotten so big (and slightly creepy) now. He is catching mosquito eaters and for some reason LOVES to spread himself out in his web juuussstt right so the sun hits him which makes him look even bigger and scarier.
I have joked with Lalo that it is time for Earl’s eviction. But I am firm that I do not want to kill him. In an odd way he is like a pet at this point. LOL Both the boys know about Earl and just leave him alone. I think he is high enough that they do not really even see him at all which helps with them being scared of him.
A few days ago, Max was in the shower. He had been in there for while. All of a sudden he starts yelling “Cara! Cara! Come Here!”. I thought hmmmm I wonder why he is calling for me, probably wanting to show me something. Max tends to call me into the bathroom multiple times to show me his face covered in bubbles, his boat floating, and how long he can hold his breath under water. I thought this must be the reason why he was calling for me. Oh, was I wrong!
He starts to point at our shelves where we have all of our shower necessities. He tells me “there is a HUUUGGGEE spider! Kill it!” I look and sure enough there is a really big spider crawling frantically around trying to hide. For a split second I thought, why didn’t you call your father for this emergency since I heavily DISLIKE spiders; but then jump into Mom Mode to rescue my sweet child from this monster!
I get some toilet paper and then realize.. um, okay, REAALLLYY are you going to try to capture this thing?!?! So, of course like any good Mom raising boys to be men, I gave the toilet paper to Max and told him to smash the spider. He looks at me like I have completely lost my mind. I laugh and take the toilet paper back and go for the shower intruder. I knock the spider off the shelving and it goes into the tub. Max screams. I tell him to wash it down the drain. He, again, looks at me like I am a mad woman. So I grab MORE toilet paper and pick up the spider to throw it into the toilet.
As Max and I are fighting off this gigantic monster, Jayden comes RUNNING into the bathroom. He is yelling “Noooooo! Did you kill Gerald?!”
Both Max and I looked at Jayden confused. WHO IS GERALD?!!!!
And then it hit me.
DID WE JUST KILL EARL? 😦
Max and I instantly look up to the bathroom window and I swear both of us praying, wishing, hoping, to see Earl in his penthouse. He was THERE!
I do not think I have ever been so happy in my life to see a spider chilling in its web.
The best part… after Max and I confirmed that we indeed had NOT killed our precious bathroom window buddy… we both turned to Jayden and said :
HIS NAME IS EARL.